goodnight i made you a song goodbye
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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