come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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