tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
