Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
