Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
