He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
