Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
