he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
