my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
