He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Please don't give away my fajitas
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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