The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize