The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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