my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
two words...techno handjob
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
