Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.