im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Randomize
