there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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