i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Randomize
