I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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