I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize