just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Randomize
