When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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