Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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