But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
