brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
