I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
