i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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