I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
