I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
handjob tips. give me some.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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