Hey man sorry I got all grabby
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
