i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is it with giant penises always finding me
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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