On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
