Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
