I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
