When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
