we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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