No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
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