So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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