Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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