dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
