Rock
Scissors
Fuck
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
A+ Viking dick
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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