Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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