My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
