Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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