i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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