these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
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