All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
