You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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