I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize