i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
