I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize
