After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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